I'm described as "weird" pretty often. When I was younger being weird was unwelcomed. I always felt that I should fit in, even though I was never willing to do what was required to fit in. Whether the current fad was having sex, drinking, being uncouth or unChristian, I knew early enough that those choices while they seeminlgy offered some short term pleasures, had no place in my life. So I just continued being weird.
Fast forward to my twenty-somethings, and still weird. I chose to do things that were complety outside the norms like purchasing my home at 25. The nay-sayers did their best to deter my efforts, but I again chose to be wierd.
Now it's 2011. I'm married, living in the US, and seemingly more weird than I was growing up. I've adopted new ways of being different, some from my husband, and some from pure innocence or ignorance to how (and why) things are done here. We just survived the Christmas season. I chose the word "survived" very carefully, because some of us almost didn't make it through. This past Christmas was another time in my life when my weirdness stood out.
There a so many traditions fluttering through this season. Shopping, Carolling, Christmas Trees, Santa Claus, Baby Jesus in a Manger, Food, and lots of busy stressed out folk. The most disturbing thing however, is that most people don't know why some of these traditions even exist. Don't believe me? Ask someone. Better yet, Ask yourself. The Baby Jesus story is pretty popular, and possibly the only tradition that makes sense in the season, yet not much emphasis is placed on him leading up to the day. The season lasts about 30 days and He gets just one day. I guess in every right Christmas Day is His day, all the other days belong to the planning and shopping.
Let's tallk about shopping. I hear people complain that Christmas has become heavily commercialised. But really it's all about supply and demand. There is a high demand for "things" in the season as people go about finding gifts for their loved ones, and all the market is doing is supplying as much of these "things" as they believe the demand will absorb. There is quite a lot "stuff" disguised in sales and bows that are apparently exactly what you need to make Christmas day special for someone you love. Really? Are you really falling for it? All this hoopla surrounding things and stuff tend to make people more tired and stressed out than anything else. There is panic and disappoinments from not finding or getting the perfect gift. The weird in me leans heavily towards wanting to spare myself and my family from that sort of seasonal frustration. Hubster and I had decided from last year (our first Christmas together) that we would not do gift exchanges. Instead, we use this time to relax, visit friends and family and enjoy and bond with each other. I like having a Christmas that is defined with words like festive, happy, relaxed, holy, rather than santa, giftcards, traffic and stress. I bask in the peace of not having to be out in the streets. When I hear people comment on how crazy it is out there I just smile, put my feet up and take another sip of my sorrel. Before I close the topic, I would like to offer some advice; If you find yourself taking out loans, and credit cards to be able to afford gifts, and posting Craiglist ads asking for financial help to finish up your shopping, you may want to consider cancelling Christmas this time around, because that's just weird.
"Mommy, where do Christmas tress come from?" "I don't know honey, just be quiet and hang the ornaments."
It would seem that the tradition of Christmas trees has passed from generation to generation with such a response. I have asked many people who choose to erect trees in their living rooms during the season that one simple question, "Why?". The popular response is that it's just tradition. Well, that's just not good enough for me.
I just can't bring myself to do something just because the masses are doing it. I have done some googling and found a bunch of ums and ahs but no solid explanations of the tradition. From Martin Luther to Paradise Trees, to a funny story about a wife who woke up and found her drunk husband had cut down a tree and brought it into the living room. I have never had a Christmas tree, and probably never will. People look at me strange when I dont get excited about their Christmas tree, or when I express that I have no plans purchase a tree and millions of tiny light bulbs, but that's ok because even though it may be one of the prettiest traditions of the season, I still think it's weird.
I'm not sure how to address the issue of Santa Claus. I strongly believe that parents have allowed this tradition to penetrate generations because... umm.. well.. I have no clue. Why do parents teach their kids about Santa Claus? I don't have children, but I am already thinking about what I will be teaching them. I like the story of St. Nicholas and even that one has many different versions, but all of which share a moral of kindess towards children and the poor. I can't see how that got twisted into a fat man flying through the sky on reindeer who then climbs through the fire place to eat your cookies. That's just weird.
Boxing Day is largely a commonwealth holiday. Decades ago "Alms Boxes" would be placed in churches on Christmas Day for people to donate gifts and money. The day after Christmas, the boxes would be opened and the contents shared with the poorer members of the church. What an awesome tradition, yet, I've never seen or experienced it. Isn't that weird? Boxing day as I know it is the day to recover from over eating on Christmas Day; The day to return or regift the "lame" presents you dont like.
Traditions tend to transform into concepts that feed our selfish, gluttonous, greedy ways. Many of the traditions we incorporate in our lives are a little ridiculous. I've watched that Jim Gaffigan video a few times and I have to admit, hearing some of these tradition broken down does make us sound like a bunch of drunks, and I think, that's weird.
We spend so much of our limited resources over extending ourselves for meaningless traditions. Our lives would be so much more fulfilling if we spent some time understanding the purpose behind our actions, finding the real meaning behind our tradtitions so that we can replace the stress in executing them with a little joy and reverence.
These days, I embrace my weirdness. I'm ok with not doing what everyone else is doing 'just because'. I like to know that my actions will add some value to my life or to others. So, call me weird but know this, because of it, my life is happy, and full of meaning. I encourage you do some research before your start celebrating your next season of traditions. Try to understand their roots, and determine whether they should really have a place in your life.